Make your shopping easy with a giftcard…
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By Kernut, on July 26th, 2010%
Looking for a new pair of shoes? Got a shoe or foot fetish? Got an animal foot fetish? Are you a Dom who needs a gift for your slave?
Let me help you out…
 Chair Shoes? Foot Chair? Do your feet get tired of walking in heels? Here’s the solution!
. Continue reading Got Kinky Shoe Fetish?
By Kernut, on June 15th, 2010%
 Shhh. Be very, very quiet. Some things just aren’t right in the world. A bit like this blog. These things have somehow managed to make it through a worm-hole from an alternate universe. A universe where things are backwards – and ‘backwards’ is acceptable.
But not here on Earth.
Much like BP Exec Tony Hayward ‘wanting his life back’, these things belong on the Planet of This Is Just So Wrong…
First up, I don’t know what the atmosphere is like in the office men’s bathroom, but in the office ladies bathroom it’s. very. quiet. With the rare (rude?) exception, we don’t chat to each other while in different bathroom stalls. We make only the briefest of small talk at the sink. I know you men are all saying “Whaa??, but why then do you gals travel in pairs to the toilet?’. Well gentlemen, the office restroom atmosphere is different than that of the bar or restaurant restroom.
Now that you’re all caught up, on with the thing that is just wrong…
There’s this one gal at my office who feels the need to GRUNT while she’s taking care of bathroom business. You’re not supposed to hear grunting in the ladies room. Ever. This is just an unspoken rule. My mother didn’t tell me this. Yours probably didn’t, either. We just all KNOW girls don’t grunt. She makes no effort to hide it, either. The grunting is very obvious – and quite disconcerting, if you ask me. Fercryingouloud – I have to wonder is she giving birth? Continue reading Some Things Are Just SO WRONG
By Kernut, on June 12th, 2010%
 This should totally be mine. The Earl of Socks, and other relatives
Rumor has it my family is related to a bunch few famous people. Most of whom you’ve probably never heard of.
Ted McGinley, the cute actor. One of his more well-known roles was as Jefferson Darcy on ‘Married with Children’. Yes, that guy! He really does look like the male members of my father’s side of the family. My aunt knows the details, but we’re distant cousins or something… which is too bad because otherwise he just might have made my last list.
On my mother’s side, we’re related to Bertrand Russell, 3rd Earl Russell, a philosopher, mathematician, humanitarian, and Nobel Prize winner. (Apparently, the “smarts” aren’t necessarily hereditary, otherwise I’d be famous rather than infamous.) We’re related through the Duke of Bedford. By all accounts a nice guy, but it seems Bertrand’s life was a bit of an emotional roller coaster at times. Here’s a quote from his biography: Continue reading The Earl of Argyll Socks, and Other Relatives
By Kernut, on March 22nd, 2010%
 Malibu Colony #63 from the deck... this was my favorite spot to sit, and where I was when Rob Reiner tried to talk to me. I'm so lame. Sorry Rob. Love your movies! Several years ago I transferred to Malibu to work as Marc Andreessen’s Estate Manager, overseeing care of the property in the Malibu Colony and managing the staff. It was a great job, for the most part.
Malibu was pretty, and pretty boring for a single gal. Not much to do so I stirred up some trouble. (You can read a bit about Malibu and one of my more interesting exploits here.) I’ll write about some of the crazier stuff later, like when my parents get tired of reading their kid’s new blog (or just give up on my ever achieving greatness, or providing grandchildren. Ya, like a starving dog with a fat bone…).
So instead, I’m going to gossip about celebrities I saw when I was lived in ‘Bu (“Bu” as the locals call it – ’cause they’re special). It’s a random list of my encounters so don’t get too excited. (The stuff I could sell to tabloids for cubic dollars I’m saving for later.)
Breakfast with Spielberg. Continue reading Life In Malibu – Celebrity Encounters
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