Can you say "airbrushed"?

Can you say “airbrushed”?

Welcome to my world!

(Would-be Stalkers should start at the “P.S.” at the bottom of this page.)

I’m an adventurous, free-spirited, life-experiencing, cat-herding, slightly bonkers gal who wants to rule the world (ok, not really that ‘rule the world’ part – it’s a shout out to the best all-time sci-fi show: MST3K. Go Pearl!).

Being single gives me the freedom to go places and do things I might not otherwise be able to do. I’m currently writing, marketing, campground hosting, and blogging from the road while traveling in my RV, with my crazy cat. (For more, read How The Great RV Rollabout Began.)

Me and my ride.

Me and my ride.

There’s really no telling what will happen next.

Meanwhile, I’m busy perpetuating all the stereotypes: single female living with a cat; never married and have no kids; blond, a little crazy and none-too-bright. My parents are very proud.

Be forewarned: My blog posts occasionally include sexual innuendo/too many cuss words  can be a little on the trashy side. Don’t judge.

I suspect I’m missing that filter in the frontal lobe that tells you when something is socially unacceptable. Again, the daughter of proud parents.

If you’re not a stalker and really want to contact me, you may reach me any of the ways listed here.

Are you new here? And still reading? Wow. Well, ok. See this page: Best of Kernut for some of my favorite more educational posts:

Now for a bit more of the boring stuff… (stalkers should start at the bottom of this page).

I’m living the true life “Adventures of Kernut” (For the origin of the word, read “What is a kernut?“.) I’ve driven Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Hummer (the one from T2), been arrested (no, not for stealing the Hummer), dated exiled royalty, been rescued by Martin Sheen – yes, THAT Martin Sheen, lead meditation groups, been a Private Investigator, driven a Bobcat earthmover, rescued wildlife (from baby birds to massive pelicans, squirrels to seals). I’ve lived in multi-million dollar beach houses, and I’ve lived in poverty. I prefer the former.

Some of the adventures I’ve had may seem unbelievable, but I assure you what I write here is true. Probably a bit crazy, often a tad sarcastic, and always true. This blog is just the chapters of my life.

Oh, and be sure to keep an eye out for typos – they should be easy to find – I make a lot of them. I look forward to your spelling and grammar-correcting emails. (Not really.) But I do live for enjoy your comments.

Happy Travels,

Kernut the Blond

P.S. A word to any would-be stalkers: Sure, I look sweet in my Photoshopped (read: you-would-not-recognize-me-on-the-street) photos, but trust me when I tell you I’m a bitch with brass nuggets. I have friends in low places who would do anything for me. My father taught me to shoot when I was eleven. Therefore, I’m a damn good shot at my ripe old age. I own guns (yes, plural – it’s not a typo). I tend to panic like a lemming, am frequently bitter, and PMSing 3 days out of every month. Know you will not succeed where others have failed, so don’t even bother.

Ok, so have a nice day!

Buy custom products at Kernut’s Zazzle store and keep me traveling!