Tag Archives: My Head Hurts

But where are you FROM?

Kernut the Blond Posted on by

“Where are you from?”

I can not count the number of times I’ve been asked that question in the last week, but I do know it is greater than in my entire life up to this point.

I must have an accent.

“Where are you from,” they ask, curiosity mixed with just a hint of suspicion.

It’s a trick question because few will accept the truth.

It’s always an odd question for full-time RVers… How do you explain to people you don’t have a home base? You aren’t “from” anywhere. If you say you aren’t from anywhere, they don’t understand. They can’t imagine not being from somewhere.

But these folks don’t know I’m an RVer when they ask. I tell them I am a full-time RVer and I travel full-time. And, still…

Everybody else: “But where are you FROM?”

Me: “I was born in New Jersey, but I wasn’t even two years old when we moved.”

Everybody else: *blank look* “So you’re from New Jersey? I know someone else from New Jersey.”

Me: “That’s just where I was born. I don’t remember anything about it. I lived in California for many years. That’s where I was living when I bought my RV four and a half years ago, got rid of my stick-and-brick, and most of my stuff, and left in my RV.”

Everybody else: “Oh, so you’re from California.”

Me: *sigh* “No, But, wait! There’s more…

How to kill Bugzilla, my once well-groomed rommate.

Kernut the Blond Posted on by

Some of you may remember Bugzilla, my new roommate and the adventurous sleepless night we had.

He’s baaaack!

(If you don’t know about Bugzilla, this story won’t make sense. Go ahead and read the link above, then come back. We’ll wait.)

It’s been almost a year and a half since Bugzilla’s last appearance. He must have kept to himself all that time, coming out only when I wasn’t around. Until a couple nights ago…

Around 10 p.m. I was getting ready for bed, collecting my book and phone to bring into the bedroom with me. I got dressed for bed, which is to say I was scantily-clad. I returned to the kitchen to shut off the light, and there on my counter was Bugzilla!

Apparently, he couldn’t wait one second longer for me to leave the room and shut off the lights.

Bugzilla is no longer afraid of the light. Even worse, Bugzilla is no longer afraid of me.

He scurries back and forth across the front edge of the counter while staring at me, as if marking out his territory. Meanwhile, I stand stock still, trying to decide how to try and kill him this time. I’m standing there watching his every move, mentally recounting the many unsuccessful methods I’d previously employed to try end his scurrying life. I have a can of Deep Woods OFF (with the strong bug-killing chemical DEET, also toxic to humas) on the same counter he’s protecting. (I’ve been using it to kill sugar ants, but that’s another story!) Perhaps it will work better than the hair-spray.

I’m debating if I can get to the can of Deep Woods OFF with DEET before he does, when HE LAUNCHES AT ME. But, wait! There’s more…

While enjoying the rain I learned I live in a sieve.

Kernut the Blond Posted on by

It’s been hot here in central Texas, hotter than a whore on nickle night at the cat house. So when the rains and cool weather came – without terrifying winds – we all enjoyed it immensely. I can’t tell you how wonderful it has been to wear pants and long-sleeved shirts for the first time in over six months.

So there I was, sitting at the computer in cozy sweat-outfit bliss, trying to catch up on email, etc. while listening to the soothing plip-plop of soft rain on the roof.

Then I heard a SPLAT-SPLAT. Huh, I thought, that drip was louder than the others.

I start to go back to my Facebooking typing when I had a second thought (yes, two in less than a minute – we wouldn’t want to tax ourselves).

Uh-oh… My mouth dropped open as my head snapped up and my focus zeroed in on the drips coming from under the entertainment center. (Feel free to insert a stream of your own dirty words.)

The RV sprung a leak, again, and in almost the same spot as last year. Some of you may recall the time when the windows let in rain. Thank goodness I was home this time, too.

While it feels at times like the Universe is conspiring against me lately with several RV issues happening all at once and myriad other things which you’ve likely been subjected to enjoyed reading, the Universe also seems to provide (sometimes) at the same time: The rain stopped while we spent a good two hours caulking the RV, the temperature was neither hot nor cold, and the rangers once again came to my rescue.

Caulking isn't just for breakfast anymore.

With caulk in her hand? Covered in caulk? There’s a joke in there somewhere. Feel free to post a better one in the comments, but remember my mom reads this blog so don’t go all perverted like that one commenter, ok? On an unrelated note, I chose this photo because my butt looks great. Sometimes, gravity works in your favor.

I would like to take this moment to express my gratitude to the wonderfully kind and helpful rangers at the park. Lets all say a nice little prayer of health and happiness and prosperity for them, ok? Seriously, now is a good time.

RV Slide Issues Update

And another Thank You But, wait! There’s more…

Bugzilla, my new roommate.

Kernut the Blond Posted on by

Are y’all sick of me telling you how big shit is in Texas? I hope not because just when I think I’ve covered the “biggest” thing Texans have, some other unnaturally-sized creature or event comes along to prove me every bit the naive Californian.

Texans have big balls… and I don’t mean parties.

You may be thinking I found this out the traditional way. Unfortunately, no.

We had another really huge storm in the southcentral area of the Texas coast on Sunday/Monday night. Tornadoes were spotted right over the little town I’m camped in just northeast of Corpus Christi. I was terrified when the tornado warning to “take immediate shelter” was announced. I grabbed my cat and headed to the cinder-block building in the park. A family from Canada was also there taking shelter.

While waiting for the storm to subside, we peeked out the door. It was then I noticed all the other RVers – ones with Texas plates – were still home, in their RVs.

In a park with over two-hundred residents, we were the only ones taking shelter: the four Canadians, the Californian and her cat.

All I can say is storms and mosquitoes aren’t the only big things in Texas. Texans have big balls, too.

But today, I want to tell you about something else “Texas-sized”. My new roommate.

But, wait! There’s more…