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Online Dating: The Profile

First, I want to extend my great thanks to all of you for your thoughtful responses!

Your advice was taken to heart. Well, except maybe the ones that said I should just get out while the getting was good. To quote reader Axel, “Go away from the light. My wife says, ‘Is that a light at the end of the tunnel, or a train?’”

And then there is Mike’s dire warning (in the comment below the Taking the Plunge post) about the sex addicts with multiple profiles.

!!!

*blond lemming feels faint, seriously reconsiders online dating*

But, like any good lemming looking for a cliff, I am moving forward with the online dating. At least for now. You never know when that cliff might suddenly appear.

To that end, I have incorporated your suggestions from the comments section below, and from my Facebook page. You may recognize the first paragraph from the profile I used years ago. I had removed it, but when Kathy suggested including my sense of humor, I added that first paragraph back in. I also mentioned the “Bipolar Kitty Test”. Heh.

Here it is: The Profile 

(Headline:) Life is a wonderful adventure!

I have all my teeth, and can form complete sen…

That was a joke. Hello? Are you still there? Humor is important, but I want to make sure we’re a good match. Don’t you? Please read my profile before you write. There might be a test later. (kidding! a little)

Life is a wonderful adventure – there’s so much to see and do! And it’s so much richer when you have someone with whom to share it!

I’m fairly active, adventurous, curious, and spontaneous, but also like to plan. I’m kindhearted, honest, direct, and a bit of a health-nut. Except for a voracious sweet tooth, I eat fairly clean (no sodas, steaks, junk food, fast food, milk, or alcohol). I write for fun, and for profit. I dreamed of traveling the country in an RV and now I’m doing it. I still need to see a lot of places, like the The Largest Ball of Twine, The Biggest Frying Pan, and Hawaii, just to name a few. Then, I’d like to visit some tropical islands and Europe.

The relationship I’m looking for: Long-term, potentially leading to marriage. Can hug someone with your whole heart? Is your heart open and ready to love again? (If you’re not emotionally available to fall in love, please skip this profile. I’m not interested in just dating.)

In case you haven’t guessed, I’m a hopeless romantic. Taking the time to build a true friendship before starting a physical relationship makes for an incredibly intimate union. (That just won’t happen in three dates and a night of nookie.) Honesty builds trust, and mutual respect – all of which are key elements to a healthy, successful relationship. I believe in taking care of each other, being there for each other, being/having that special someone who is “in your corner”.

Qualities I have and am looking for in a lifemate: A single (not married – or separated!) man, who is also looking for a LTR/Marriage by building a friendship first. Intelligence, honesty, integrity, kindness, compassion, and affection are must-haves. An active, adventurous spirit, the desire and means to travel, a health-conscious lifestyle (healthy food choices and exercise), familiarity with the social graces (manners and personal hygiene are just the basics), into giving and receiving massage, spiritually/metaphysically oriented, open to trying meditation and/or practicing the Law of Attraction.

Things that make me swoon: Good manners, a gentlemen who opens my door, great conversation, emotional intimacy before physical intimacy, kind or romantic gestures.

Things that scare me: Getting lost at night in a strange town. Heights. The beginning of a serious relationship. Can you be my rock when I’m afraid? Can you be calmly reassuring and lend me your strength until I find mine again?

(Just so you know I’m not a total powder-puff, I drive a full-sized RV pulling a car around the country by myself. I can also operate a bobcat earthmover, and a chainsaw. I may also be a better shot than you. ;) )

Things I enjoy: The beach, being out in the sun, traveling, chocolate, all animals, daily meditation, healthy living and eating, seeing and learning new things, exploring new places, neuroscience, museums, sailing, volunteering, tasting the world, spirituality, meditating and/or practicing the Law of Attraction with my significant other, being a kid at heart, being alive.

Please have a completed profile, feel we are a good match, and be within 100 miles of (location) before writing. A sincere, not cut and pasted, email is far more likely to get a reply than a one to two sentence note.

Should you make it to Phase Two, you will have to pass the Bipolar Kitty Test. *snicker* (more of that aforementioned humor)

I look forward to hearing from you! We’re here to enjoy life. Let’s do it together! Have a great day! :)

Ok, my dear Kernutties, what do you think?

What is the impression you get of “this person” when you read it?

What are your suggestions?

Next post, we will discuss and review photos. Oh, joy.

UPDATED: See comments for latest version, with some other suggestions incorporated.

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14 comments to UPDATED Online Dating: The Profile

  • Richard

    The relationship I’m looking for: Long-term, potentially leading to marriage. Can hug someone with your whole heart? Is your heart open and ready to love again? (If you’re not emotionally available to fall in love, please skip this profile. I’m not interested in just dating.),

    well that pretty much covers it all. LOLOL:):):):) best wishes and adventuring God Bless

  • travelfables

    Good luck with it, Why the limitation of a 100 miles?

    • Thanks! The reason for the limitation is because I want to get to know someone in real life, to spend time with them. I just can’t see truly getting to know someone long distance, let alone having a relationship satisfying to either party.

      Of course, chances may be slim that The One is within that radius, but you never know.

      • travelfables

        Coolness, It is shopping (this online dating thing)- might as well say what cha want up front, but heck – as a country fella (who had to drive to go anywhere in my younger days) and RVer – some of my most yummy romances have extended to at least 250 miles – (they were never built from an online dating thing though). When I’m in full RV / mojo-is-workin’ mode: – then I’m game to change the gps (I consider that an RVer’s super power). Heck – when things are as they should be , I’d change my gps if someone drops a cool-looking hat on a random street on a Tuesday, so a good romance potential wouldn’t stop me from being at least somewhat nearby a promising Saint-Somewhere-Else. That’s why I was curious as to the distance thing. I guess its different with gals, sort of like a spam-filter on email due to all the noise they get. Anyway-again-Happy dating adventures.

        • There are few dating sites I’m checking out, and most have a distance limit on them. I might change the zip code, and widen the search field because the current selection of candidates is rather limited.

          As an RVer, I am willing to relocate, to some degree (nowhere with snow). But I still want to travel around the country, preferably with a compatible romantic partner. :) The singles in the RVer group are all doing their own thing. I might have to commandeer a civilian! LOL

  • Mike

    It seems a little long to me but in the end only the right guy will read it over and over anyway. Then he will come here and read you blog from start to finish. He will remember your name instead of honey or beautiful. Probably forget to open your car door and a few other annoying things but you will know he is the right one when its time and those will be overlooked. The important thing for you is your shopping. Think of it as a rare antique hunt. Only you not looting for the perfect dresser or the best sterling flatware. Your looking for a rare original painting that no one else has discovered. Probably wont find it in the first 5 or 20 shops. May be in 50 or 100or more, but if your looking, you will find it. It just may take some time to focus on what that painting actually is to know its the one. ;-)

    • It seems long to me, too, but I’ve rather say more than less, weeding out those with whom I don’t match.

      I like the analogy of shopping for a rare item.

      There will be cellulite and smelly socks, but they won’t get to see the blog before then :)

      (LOL on the crumb-stuck “R”!)

  • Mike

    Appears I didnt get the extra crispy chicken crumbs out from under my R. lol

  • Andy G!

    Why the 100 mile limit? Have you seen the price of gas lately? At 8 mpg, downhill, it adds up really fast!

    • LOL Yes, gas is expensive (but not as much as in California!!). But, I am looking for The One – the chance of him living within 100 miles are probably slim. Although, you never know. He just might have an RV, too, and travel to my location. :)

  • You’ve all given me great feedback on the profile! I incorporated as much of it as I could, without making it shorter.

    A friend suggested making it much shorter, down to about a dozen sentences. The reason I opted to go for the longer profile is I’m hoping to find The One, and weed out all others. “The One” and anyone seriously looking for a relationship rather than just sex will read it all. Last time I did this, I discovered the ones looking for a quick hookup don’t read anything – but they do respond to photos.
    (Photos are discussed in the post immediately following this one.)

    Without further ado, here is the updated version currently in use on a few sites…

    Life is an adventure! And so is online dating.

    I have all my teeth, and can form complete sen…

    That was a joke. Hello? Are you still there? Humor is important, but I want to make sure we’re a good match. Don’t you? Please read my profile before you write. There might be a test later. (kidding! a little)

    Life is a wonderful adventure – there’s so much to see and do! And it’s so much richer when you have someone with whom to share it!

    I’m fairly active, adventurous, curious, and spontaneous, but also like to plan. I’m kindhearted, honest, direct, and a bit of a health-nut. Except for a voracious sweet tooth, I eat fairly clean (no sodas, steaks, junk food, fast food, milk, or alcohol). I write for fun, and for profit. I dreamed of traveling the country in an RV and now I’m doing it. I still need to see a lot of places, like the The Largest Ball of Twine, The Biggest Frying Pan, and Hawaii, just to name a few. Then, I’d like to visit some tropical islands and Europe.

    The relationship I’m looking for: Long-term, potentially leading to marriage. Can you hug someone with your whole heart? Is your heart open and ready to love again? (If you’re not emotionally available to fall in love, please skip this profile. I’m not interested in just dating.)

    In case you haven’t guessed, I’m a hopeless romantic. Taking the time to build a true friendship before starting a physical relationship makes for an incredibly intimate union. (That just won’t happen in three dates and a night of nookie.) Honesty builds trust, and mutual respect – all of which are key elements to a healthy, successful relationship. I believe in taking care of each other, being there for each other, being/having that special someone who is “in your corner”.

    Qualities I have and am looking for in a lifemate: A single (not married – or separated!) man, who is also looking for a LTR/Marriage by building a friendship first. Intelligence, honesty, integrity, kindness, compassion, passionate, and affectionate are must-haves. An active, adventurous spirit, the desire and means to travel, a health-conscious lifestyle (healthy food choices and exercise), familiarity with the social graces (manners and personal hygiene are just the basics), into giving and receiving massage, spiritually/metaphysically oriented, open to trying meditation and/or practicing the Law of Attraction.

    Things that make me swoon: Good manners, a gentlemen who opens my door, great conversation, emotional intimacy before physical intimacy, kind or romantic gestures.

    Things that scare me: Getting lost at night in a strange town. Heights. The beginning of a serious relationship. Can you be my rock when I’m afraid? Can you be calmly reassuring and lend me your strength until I find mine again?

    (Just so you know I’m not a total powder-puff, I drive a full-sized RV pulling a car around the country by myself. I can also operate a bobcat earthmover, and a chainsaw. I may also be a better shot than you. ;) )

    Things I enjoy: The beach, being out in the sun, traveling, chocolate, all animals, daily meditation, healthy living and eating, seeing and learning new things, exploring new places, neuroscience, museums, sailing, volunteering, tasting the world, spirituality, meditating and/or practicing the Law of Attraction with my significant other, being a kid at heart, being alive.

    Please have a completed profile, feel we are a good match, and be within a distance you don’t mind driving regularly before writing. A sincere, not cut and pasted, email is far more likely to get a reply than a one or two sentence note.

    Should you make it to Phase Two, you will have to pass the Bipolar Kitty Test. *snicker* (< – some of that aforementioned humor :)

    We’re here to enjoy life, let’s do it together! I look forward to hearing from you! Have a great day! :)

    {Interests: (listed when given a place to do so…) Exploring new places, festivals, fine dining, roadside attractions, golf, hiking, RV, traveling, car shows, blues, music, concerts, reading, beach, learning, meditation, Law of Attraction, animals, volunteering, etc.]