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In the Land of the Vampires

Kernut the Blond Posted on May 14, 2019 by KernutMay 14, 2019

Three things you may or may not know about NOLA (that’s “New Orleans, Louisiana,” for those of you who don’t get out much) and vampires:

New Orleans is purportedly the home to 50 real vampires, according to a study by Louisiana State University doctoral candidate John Edgar Browning.

The vampires have their own association, New Orleans Vampire Association (NOVA).

There’s a New Orleans Vampire Tour. Naturally.

Not for lack of trying, I didn’t see any vampires while I was there – at least that I know of. My friend and I toured Lafayette Cemetery (which was likely FULL of vampires), the French Quarter (any vampires were hiding from the daylight or well disguised), and the Basilica (where there were no vampires, probably).

The French Quarter…

When in Rome NOLA, do as the locals do (and probably every tourist within 100 miles). This was my first time in NOLA so our first stop was the famous Cafe Du Monde for benigets and coffee, of course. Fortified with sugar and caffeine, we were ready to do NOLA take on vampires, and ride in a pimp-driven carriage.

Joan of Arc, Maid of New Orleans

Joan of Arc, Maid of New Orleans. The shiny gold statue greets you on Decatur Street as you enter the French Quarter.

But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Louisiana, Old Stuff, Queen of The Zombies | Tagged I Am Queen of The Zombies, Umm what?

My best friend died today.

Kernut the Blond Posted on February 15, 2019 by KernutFebruary 15, 2019

(I started writing this post a few months ago. It has been the hardest post I’ve ever written. Certainly not my best work, but definitely the hardest message to articulate.)

Time stopped for me today.

Jeff, my best friend, my love, my partner in crime passed away. That one person who cared about the minutiae of my day isn’t here anymore.

And time has stopped for me.

You all know him, to one degree or another. He was a “background extra” in many of the photos on this blog. He was shy and said he didn’t want to appear in photos. But he secretly enjoyed it and later came to face the camera head-on putting aside any lingering self-consciousness. He was also the occasional subject of posts: some about our travels, some about his support, and some briefly mentioning our highs and lows or the struggles of alcoholism.

Jeff had the bggest heart of anyone I’ve ever known.

I fell in love with that big heart over six years ago. We But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Adventures, Gentlemen, Good For The Soul, Thank You, When I'm Not Here | Tagged Adventures, Gentlemen, Love

Gone up the road a ways to Mississippi

Kernut the Blond Posted on December 1, 2018 by KernutNovember 27, 2018

Y’all know how I don’t like to be on the gulf coast when big storms are coming. Until the hurricane passes, I usually go up the road a ways to Mississippi. On one of those trips, I stayed at LeFleur’s Bluff State Park right in Jackson. It’s a beautiful park right on the Pearl River.

When in Mississippi, I go see stuff. Which brings us to a brief slide show…

Mississippi Museum of Natural Science in Jackson

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

In between running from storms, I’ve taken up kayaking! When the weather is nice, But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Mississippi, Panic Much, RV Lifestyle | Tagged Kayaking, Life on the Gulf Coast, RV Travels, Weird wacky wonderful

The Life of Pye: A Tale of Two Kitties

Kernut the Blond Posted on November 26, 2018 by KernutNovember 27, 2018

Perhaps I should call this post A tale of two tails.

Or maybe The Life of Sugar and Pye.

This is also another entry in Tales from the RV Park.

Most of you are aware of my penchant for rescuing stray cats (and wounded men, but that’s another post). Pye was a stray cat before she adopted me. Her extra long frame and large body belie the undersized, sickly stray kitten she was when she arrived on my doorstep six years ago.

She turned six years old this past March. For her birthday, I got her a “kitty tent” with attached toys. She can hide inside it, stick her head or a paw through openings, play with the hanging toys. She loved it for about two hours. Now she is bored with it. (But not the other toy I got her!)

I call the cat tunnel "the Chunnel".

I call the cat tunnel “the Chunnel”.

But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Animals, Tales From the RV Park | Tagged Life of Pye, Life of Sugar, Stray Cats & Wounded Men

One and a half Mississippi Lighthouses

Kernut the Blond Posted on March 5, 2018 by KernutMarch 5, 2018

Q: When is a lighthouse not a lighthouse? Is it still a lighthouse if it’s not on Google? (This is along the lines of, “If a tree falls in the forest and no one hears it, does it still make a sound?”)

A: (according to Kernut’s logic): If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it’s a duck – even if Google doesn’t know it’s a duck.

One of these Mississippi lighthouses is in Biloxi and I thought the other was in Gulfport…. But when I Googled did my extensive research, there is no light listed in that area – at least as far a Google knows.

The Biloxi Lighthouse
The Biloxi Lighthouse

The Biloxi Lighthouse

But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Lighthouses, Mississippi, Wonderful | Tagged Lighthouses, Weird wacky wonderful

USS Alabama is in — Alabama

Kernut the Blond Posted on February 28, 2018 by KernutMarch 5, 2018

The USS Alabama is a BIG boat! It’s a bazillion levels tall (I looked it up) with lots of stairs. No, really – LOTS. OF. STAIRS. And narrow hallways and little cramped rooms.

There are three levels below deck, and at least eight levels above deck. I started with the bottom levels and then went to the upper levels, looking in each of the many little rooms. Normally, I can withstand small spaces and large crowds for short periods of time without any effects whatsoever, but I stopped after the fifth upper level because I was starting to get too claustrophobic and agoraphobic – I can only stay so long in small spaces and crowded places before my skin starts crawling and my anxiety level goes through the roof.

And people lived in these cramped quarters for years. I would’ve jumped ship.

The USS Alabama

The USS Alabama – too big to fit in the picture frame.

But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Alabama, Panic Much, When I'm Not Here | Tagged Adventures, Panic Shmanic, Worlds Largest

A is for Alligators

Kernut the Blond Posted on January 28, 2018 by KernutJanuary 28, 2018

A is for Alligators

B is for Bama (aka Alabama)

There are alligators in Alabama.

Hi, I’m still here. Sorry it’s been so long. It’s taken me a long time to write a post because I’ve been stuck on what to write about this one and the next. While both adventures were great, I was at a loss for what to write.

The other reason is that my website is running soooo sloooow and GoDaddy only wants to sell me more hosting (I already have the Deluxe plan, and relatively little traffic). About 70% of the time I log in, I can’t get anything done because my site is running at a snail’s pace.

Other than that, all is well in the Florida panhandle. Life is good. I’m working, mostly from home. Between sitting all day, being near the fridge all day, and a new allergy medication, I’ve put on a few pounds. I’ve gone back to working out several days a week and eating better. But I’ll never give up chocolate.

But I digress. (Ah, I bet y’all missed that? Ha.)

There are alligators in Alabama. No surprise, right? The surprise is that I have yet to see one in the wild, on the loose, chasing small children or pets. Not a one.

Feed your kids to the gators.

Feed your kids to the gators.

 

I went to Alligator Alley in Summerdale, Alabama, to see gators. But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Alabama, Animals, Phoning It In | Tagged Adventures, I clicked for this?, Weird wacky wonderful

A Pussy in the Brothel

Kernut the Blond Posted on December 16, 2017 by KernutDecember 18, 2017

It’s been some time since I used a really catchy (read: risque) title. I’m sure Google just downgraded my site and diverted my already slim traffic.

About the title…

As many of you know, Pye doesn’t travel well. You may recall the time she destroyed her brand new (cloth) carrier in a howling fit a few years ago during our return trip from the time she rode in the chassis for 150 miles. Clearly, she doesn’t do many things well like staying put, with the possible exception of eating, shedding and scratching furniture.

When I temporarily relocated in advance the two recent storms, I reluctantly admited the duct tape was no longer a practical solution to the Pye-shaped holes in the once-new-and-still-hardly-used cat carrier. With plans for an upcoming trip to Tennessee, Oklahoma, Texas, and Louisiana (the trip never happened, but that’s a boring story), I decided to upgrade to a metal, Pye-proof cat carrier.

I ordered it online and, like many things on the internet, But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Brothels, Humor, She's Classy | Tagged Cats, Humor, Life of Pye, My Parents Wish I Didn't Blog

Lady in the Lake, Dinosaurs and a Knight in the Woods

Kernut the Blond Posted on November 12, 2017 by KernutNovember 13, 2017

I’m pretty sure I was drawn to this place for a reason – the Cheezy Americana energy is strong. Like the Force is strong in the Star Wars Universe.

Come to think of it, I was pulled to this area. Ok, maybe it was more like how a moth is pulled to a flame. But in my defense, I didn’t know any of this stuff was here before I started exploring the area.

Remember George Barber? My second cousin, (probably)? That guy who loves goofy roadside attractions, like Bamahenge? (We have to be related.)

Well, Bamahenge isn’t his only goofy roadside attraction… On his massive, wooded property leading up to Barber Marina, Mr. Barber let loose dinosaurs, knights, the World’s Largest Sundial, a Caesars Palace-style fountain, and the Lady in the Lake. (It’s mostly pictures from here on out, so don’t give up now.)

Dinosaurs and Knights in the Woods

You went to Bamahenge, right? Good. Well, keep heading down the same road and before long you’ll start to see dinosaurs in the woods.

T-Rex in Elberta, Alabama

T-Rex in Elberta, Alabama

Godzilla’s cousin, T-Rex is in Elberta, Alabama. But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Cheezy Americana, Who Thinks of These Things, Worlds Largest | Tagged Alabama, Lover of All Things Cheezy, Weird wacky wonderful, Worlds Largest

Was the Petrified Cat Scared to Death? And a dollhouse on Main Street.

Kernut the Blond Posted on October 26, 2017 by KernutNovember 1, 2017

(Those two things are not related.)

If a cat is petrified and dead, was it scared to death?

(Ahahahaa! I crack me up!)

Seriously, folks, there’s a petrified (dead, not scared) cat in Pensacola. No, I’m not talking about Pye, my oft-scared, bi-polar feline companion for whom I occasionally consider finding a new home… she is alive and well and scratching the crap out of my furniture.

I am talking about a dead cat on display, no less, in a museum. Yup, right here in the good ol’ U.S. of A. can you find such treasures at the local museum as a petrified (dead, not scared) cat on display.

Ah, don’t you just love America? I mean, seriously, in what other country are dead things proudly displayed for a small viewing fee? Cases in point: The (Infamous) Mutter Museum’s collection of dead body parts in jars; The (Dead) Thing in Arizona;  The Two-headed (and doubly dead) Goat in Bandera, Texas; and then there’s Cabela’s – a nation-wide chain devoted to selling hunting merchandise centered around dead things on display.

Only. In. America.

On display at the T.T. Wentworth, Jr., Museum in downtown Pensacola, a small card below tells of the unfortunate fate of the feline from 1850.

Without further ado… (don’t look if you’re squeamish) But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Cheezy Americana, Florida, Wacky, Who Thinks of These Things | Tagged Cats, Lover of All Things Cheezy, Weird wacky wonderful

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