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Kernut the Blond

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Category Archives: WTF?

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Once Upon A Time I Had A Blog – Tales From the RV Park

Kernut the Blond Posted on August 20, 2023 by KernutAugust 21, 2023

Today’s adventure: Tales From the RV Park – Stray Cats and Wounded Men. I am at an RV park in southern Alabama. I’ve been here about a year. There are around 100-150 people here, mostly seniors, mostly single. Lots of heavy drinkers. As some of you may recall, I don’t drink any more.

But, wait! There's more...
Posted in Humor, Tales From the RV Park, WTF? | Tagged Cats, Dating, Single, Tales From the RV Park

Tales From The RV Park: Kid steals golf cart – It does not end well

Kernut the Blond Posted on July 25, 2020 by KernutJuly 25, 2020

I uttered an expletive (or two), wrapped myself in a towel and opened the front door just in time to see a little kid trying to speed away (rather poorly) in a golf cart.

But, wait! There's more...
Posted in Tales From the RV Park, When I'm Not Here, WTF? | Tagged Tales From the RV Park, Trouble, WTF?

In the Time of The Coronapocalypse

Kernut the Blond Posted on April 20, 2020 by KernutApril 20, 2020
Finished Netflix. Now what?

Oddities during the Time of The Coronapocalypse.

I learned I love stillness in the world.

I learned I have grandiose dreams (yeah, I know that shouldn’t come as such a surprise to me) that I will not fulfill when given half the chance. (<--- THAT came as the real surprise.) I attended a virtual memorial for a friend. There were over 150 people on the Zoom call honoring JG's memory. He was a good man who touched many lives and helped countless people. I aspire to do half as well as JG. I had a birthday anniversary of my 29th birthday during the Coronapocalypse and no one came. (Ok, ok, no one could come, but that's not the point.) I had cake for breakfast, pizza for lunch, and exercised for dinner. I learned you could finish Netflix. Disney+, sure. But Netflix? Never saw that coming.  And most surprising to me, I miss the energy of people.

But, wait! There's more...
Posted in Delusions of Grandeur, When I'm Not Here, WTF?, Zombie Apocalypse | Tagged I Am Queen of The Zombies, Umm what?, Zombies Are Coming

Amazon Has Hookers and Drugs For Sale. I am not making this up.

Kernut the Blond Posted on June 9, 2019 by KernutJune 9, 2019
hookers and drugs for sale on Amazon

Amazon has hookers and drugs for sale! I am not making this up.

No lie. AMAZON the online bookstore/everything store – has hookers and drugs listed for sale. And this post is not safe for work because of nudity and pictures of drug use – Thanks for that, Amazon. Now people will have to wait until they get home to read this.

But, wait! There's more...
Posted in A Cuss Word Will Do, Criminal Acts, International Incident, Social Media, Trouble, Weird, WTF? | Tagged Crimes and Misdemeanors, Things That Make you Go Huh, Things You Should Know, Trouble, Umm what?, WTF?

Tales From the RV Park: Kernut vs. Critters

Kernut the Blond Posted on January 26, 2017 by KernutJanuary 30, 2017
Zombie Squirrel Returns from Roadkill

In light of subsequent events, this saga will henceforth be referred to as Kernut vs. Critters.

I hate glue traps. Have a I mentioned that before? Maybe once or twice?
Shortly after posting Kernut vs. Critters, part 1, I discovered a massive nest built on top of my RV gas tank. It had branches (complete with leaves),

But, wait! There's more...
Posted in Queen of The Zombies, Tales From the RV Park, WTF?, Zombie Apocalypse | Tagged Tales From the RV Park, Things That Make you Go Huh, Zombies Are Coming

Tales From the RV Park: Zombie Rat 8, Kernut 0

Kernut the Blond Posted on January 16, 2017 by KernutJanuary 26, 2017

The zombie rat is winning. I first began hearing things “go bump in the night” a few weeks ago: a bump on the underside of the RV, a bump in the front. I wondered what critter had enough body mass to make a thud that reverberated through the chassis. And then Pye started sitting in the well of the drivers seat, where your feet go, staring at the wall that separates the peddles from the engine.

But, wait! There's more...
Posted in Queen of The Zombies, Tales From the RV Park, WTF?, Zombie Apocalypse | Tagged I Am Queen of The Zombies, Tales From the RV Park, Things That Make you Go Huh, Zombies Are Coming

Tales From the RV Park: Holy Haters Batman!

Kernut the Blond Posted on August 4, 2015 by KernutAugust 18, 2015
Say NO to haters.

Tales From the RV Park: Holy Haters Batman! I have never met a more unhappy, unfriendly concentration of people since Los Angeles. But even the folks in L.A. like to meditate without bitching.

But, wait! There's more...
Posted in A Cuss Word Will Do, Tales From the RV Park, WTF? | Tagged Rants, Tales From the RV Park, WTF?

Tales From the RV Park: Perpetually Plastered Goes to the Pokey

Kernut the Blond Posted on October 5, 2014 by KernutFebruary 22, 2015
It's a shame you can't buy common sense like you can buy deodorant.

Perpetually Plastered (first introduced here) has done it again.

But let me back up a bit… Perpetually Plastered got his first DUI at 13. Yes, thirteen years old. He wasn’t legally old enough to drive, let alone drink. I learned this when I ran a little background check on him and came across an old newspaper article from his home town. The arresting officer

But, wait! There's more...
Posted in Tales From the RV Park, WTF? | Tagged Crimes and Misdemeanors, Tales From the RV Park, Texas

Tales From the RV Park: Peeing In My Yard

Kernut the Blond Posted on September 30, 2014 by KernutSeptember 30, 2014
It's a shame you can't buy common sense like you can buy deodorant.

Saturday morning at 12:45 am, I hear a woman yelling – and she sounds close by, in my yard close by. I get out of bed, look out the curtains covering my door, and turn on the porch light – illuminating the new gal’s bare butt popping a squat (“peeing”, for those of you older or younger than the slang term) in my yard!

But, wait! There's more...
Posted in Tales From the RV Park, WTF? | Tagged I couldn't make this up, Tales From the RV Park, WTF?

Tales From the New Office: It’s A Zoo and I’m in Quarantine

Kernut the Blond Posted on July 31, 2014 by KernutAugust 21, 2014

It says: ATTENTION: Do not let Rozko (“Roscoe”) out of office. He must be quarantined for 10 DAYS! If he shows signs or dies, I have rabies. (signed by the boss)

It might as well say, “Rabies inside your new office, but don’t worry about it – you can keep working.”

But, wait! There's more...
Posted in Jobs I Had, Texas, WTF? | Tagged Crazy Jobs I Had, Texas, Things That Make you Go Huh

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Recent Posts: RV Travels, Zombies, Random Crap

  • And this is why I have more cats than men in my life
  • Once Upon A Time I Had A Blog – Tales From the RV Park
  • How to Day Trade – It’s not gambling, unless you’re stupid
  • Tales From The RV Park: Kid steals golf cart – It does not end well
  • In the Time of The Coronapocalypse
  • Tanked in Perdido Key and a Covered Bridge in Elberta
  • New York part 2: Central Park and The Met
  • Taking a bite out of The Big Apple
  • It snowed in Minnesota, dontcha know.
  • Amazon Has Hookers and Drugs For Sale. I am not making this up.
  • In the Land of the Vampires
  • My best friend died today.
  • Gone up the road a ways to Mississippi
  • The Life of Pye: A Tale of Two Kitties
  • One and a half Mississippi Lighthouses
  • USS Alabama is in — Alabama
  • A is for Alligators
  • A Pussy in the Brothel
  • Lady in the Lake, Dinosaurs and a Knight in the Woods
  • Was the Petrified Cat Scared to Death? And a dollhouse on Main Street.

Archives. Because one Kernutty post is never enough…

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