For Ten Things Tuesday… You get a Ten Things Bonus Round! neato. Ten Things I Like About Being Single 1. My stuff is always where I left it. Unless the cat moves it or eats it. Very rare. 2. The cat doesn’t much care how the house looks. Probably why … But, wait! There’s more…
My sister, Chickenbone, once told me ‘Don’t bring sand to the beach.’
Me: ???
Chickenbone: If you’re single, don’t bring a date to a party.
Me: (still) ???
Chickebone: …where there are single men.
Me (a minute later): Ohhhh. (the light bulb isn’t always super bright, folks)
But, wait! There's more...This is part 2 of my trip to Spain. (Part 1 in the series is here: The Rain In Spain Falls Mainly…) Advance apologies for the length and rantiness of this post. I promise the next will just be about my adventures and impressions of Spain. When we left off… … But, wait! There’s more…
This kind of weirdness permeated the entire trip. Permeated it like a thick black tar. Not unlike the crap washing ashore in Louisiana and Santa Barbara right this moment: That oil-drilling residue tar that just sticks to you and is damn near impossible to remove. Ever have that shit stuck on your feet? It’s hella hard to get off.
But, wait! There's more...Then I see something interestingly familiar… the male starts slowly inching towards the female.
Male: Fluff, preen, inch a step closer, wait…. Fluff, preen, inch a step closer, wait…. Fluff, preen, inch a step closer, wait….
But, wait! There's more...FINALLY, after a few rounds of “What’s your favorite fruit loop flavor?” eHarmony reveals the pictures to me.
But, wait! There's more...Oh, it gets better.
His face was orange. Yes, ORANGE. He’d used a low-quality tan-in-a-bottle to enhance his pasty skin tone. Unfortunately, BLENDING was not his strong point. Dear readers, he was a rookie at the fake-bake usage.
But, wait! There's more...Dating Advice for Social Media from my MySpace blog in 2007 (a time when I was much more jaded than now – if that’s possible). While originally about MySpace, much of this also applies to Facebook. MySpace made me über jaded about dating. It’s all MySpace’s fault for letting those … But, wait! There’s more…
They ask, ‘Why are you single??’ or ‘Why haven’t you been married??’ But when they ask, with face half turned and narrowed eye, the tone says: “Is there something wrong with you that I can’t see??” (Uh, not trying to hide it. At all. Pay attention.) Or it sounds like … But, wait! There’s more…
