Ten Things I’ve Learned About Living In An RV

Kernut the Blond Posted on by

‘Ten Things’?! What randomness is this? Wait, it must be Tuesday! For your reading pleasure, I present an (increasingly) rare Ten Things Tuesday post…

My RV, with the slides out. :)

My RV, with the slides out. 🙂

Believe it or not, in my first week here I’ve already learned Ten Things about living in an RV. Trust me when I say that while I did about eight months of research, there is still some “trial by fire” involved for this newbie in embarking on the full-time RV lifestyle.

1. If it’s not nailed down, it will move when you try to drive. Trust me on this one and nail it down. Whatever it is, just put a nail in it so it can’t move. How did I learn this? You know those little bottles of cooking extracts like vanilla, orange, mint, or almond? They fall and roll when in a moving vehicle. No, really, they do. Individually they smell intoxicating. Mixed together as a puddle in the bottom of your cabinet? Not so good.

2. There are four, yes, FOUR possible power sources for appliances: House batteries, generator, propane, city power/hookups. Generally, an appliance is able to use two of the four sources, but it also depends on the conditions at the time. As my memory is about as good as that of a goldfish (Once around the bowl and I’m saying ‘Oooh, that rock is new!’), I can’t be expected to remember which is which and when.

3. If you want hot water for your first shower in your new RV, you have to turn on the water heater. But, wait! There’s more…

With A Little Help From My Friends

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My new rig. We're at an RV park for a couple weeks before heading to BlogHer '11 in San Diego.

My new rig. We're at an RV park for a couple weeks before heading to BlogHer '11 in San Diego. (There are better pics but they're stuck in my camera, and the cord is still packed. Somewhere.

I got my RV!

My dream of traveling the country in an RV wouldn’t have been possible without help from my friends and family.

This includes you. Yes, you, reading this right now.

The following people helped sponsor this dream, either financially or supplied valuable information on purchasing an RV. Please visit their websites and businesses if you have a need for their services. While their financial support helped make my dream come true, their emotional support and willingness to help another follow her dream – no matter how crazy it may seem to a few others – means the world to me.

These people believe, and made me believe in magic….

Networker, Inc. The Human Resource Specialists. Networker, Inc. provides consulting and personnel services to clients throughout the U.S. As a full-service human resources consulting firm, they offer personal attention to their clients. Working with public and private sector clients they enhance individual as well as organizational excellence and effectiveness. Marilynn C. Mathews, President of Networker, Inc., is author of Strategic Intervention in Organizations, a classic management book, and numerous journal articles. Her organizational research has been cited in academic journals and media such as Newsweek, BusinessWeek, and the Wall Street Journal.

Alyne Hazard, Award-winning Belly Dancer and Instructor. But, wait! There’s more…

The Great Roll-About: Single Female Traveling Long Term in an RV

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This blog is about to change. A lot.

For the better, I hope. But I can’t make any promises.

I’m almost officially a gypsy. If all goes as planned by this time next week I’ll have no “permanent home”, and few possessions. Before you start to feel sorry for me, know that I’ve been looking forward to this for a long time.

Uhh, what did you just say?? You’ve been looking forward to this?

Remember, I’m here because I’m not all there.

gypsy caravan

I didn't know you could get them gilded! Next time I'm ordering mine gilded.

For almost two years now I’ve fantasized about getting a motorhome, traveling the country like a gypsy while writing about my adventures. Granted, I often don’t know the difference between a fantasy and a plan. But is there really a difference? Must they be mutually exclusive?

And my dream is about to begin. I bought an RV, and will take possession of it in about a week. I can’t wait! I’m excited, and really hope I can pull this off. But, wait! There’s more…

My Brain Thinks Money Is A Drug and My New Boyfriend

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Guess what I learned recently? A study found the brain views money as a drug. They found it lessens social distress and physical pain.

No shit? Well, color me addicted.

They also suspect it is a substitute for romance.

Huh.

Coincidentally, I’ve just found my new boyfriend!

This is a picture of my bank account after I win the lottery.

This is a picture of my bank account after I win the lottery. No, wait. It's a picture of my new boyfriend. No, that's not it either. It's a picture of BOTH!

To quote the article Study: Your Brain Thinks Money Is A Drug by David Kestenbaum,

If you’ve ever thought of money as a drug, you may be more right than you know. New research shows that counting money — just handling the bills — can make things less painful.

…

Money As A Substitute For Love But, wait! There’s more…

On My Way To Hell In A Handbasket, I Was Hugged By A Saint

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I know, I know. I can hear you all saying… ‘Kernut, who? Kernut the Blond? Hmm, that sounds vaguely familiar.’

Sorry. (Assuming you’ve missed me.) Honestly, I’ve missed you all.

Believe me, I’ve wanted to write, but I’ve got nothing.

A big fat nothing.

And I’m On My Way To Hell In A Hand Basket

A pitcure of Limbo.

Limbo looks like this, just so you know.

I feel like I’m in limbo. Waiting to get a great job (six months now, but I’m loving my freedom and mobility!). Waiting to start The Great Roll-About in my RV (more fantasy then reality at this moment, but it makes me happy to envision the possibilities). Waiting to win the lottery jackpot and/or become a multi-millionaire because I really don’t want to go back to work for someone else (see previous note).

Waiting for something to change so I can tell you about it.

Meanwhile? I’ve got nothing.

And without a steady income my apartment is quickly becoming an expensive luxury. But, wait! There’s more…

I Want Me Some Navy SEAL

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Who knew the demise of a terrorist dictator would have such an effect on me?

Ok, so maybe the strong and protective men of our military, exercising their strengths, would obviously get me excited, but hey, it still took me by surprise.

While I don’t advocate war, I do respect and appreciate our soldiers. They do something few of us could, and we are safer because of it. I’m sure after the team is done celebrating, the dark realization will set in.

I’ve had the great pleasure of giving a motivational-type talk to a groups of Veterans recently. This was a troubled bunch that had seen and done things that they’ll never be able to forget. This group was in the process of getting help for their nightmares and desire to drown the images with drugs and alcohol. It brought me to tears knowing the sacrifices they had made to keep us and this country safe.

In honor of our military heroes, I made some t-shirts. Hug a Veteran, Hug a Soldier, and more…

I want me some Navy Seal

Navy SEAL Team 6 Member In Training

Hug a Navy Seal

Personally, I would like to hug the model in the above photo.

(more stuff ahead…) But, wait! There’s more…

My Royal Wedding Invitation, Three Generations Too Early

Kernut the Blond Posted on by

I’ve been trying to come up with something to write, but all I’ve got is a list of random stuff that makes for better titles than posts. I couldn’t even come up with ten of them for a Ten Things Tuesday post.

Huh. My life is in the shitter.

My mother just told me my great grandparents were invited to the Royal Wedding of Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip.

Wow!

They didn’t go.

WTHuh??!

What did I learn from this? You dis the Royal family once, and your future generations will never ever be invited again.

I’m considering giving up dating, for good. The men I’m meeting have no follow-through. They act totally interested, but then seem to get cold feet. After attempting to schedule a second date, they fall off the face of the earth if I can’t meet the ONE time they suggested. It doesn’t matter if I’ve met them online, or through friends (the preferred way).

Case in point: But, wait! There’s more…

The Best Date I’ve Had Since I Joined Match.com

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After spending a couple hours getting to know each other, I was ready.

Really ready.

I’ve waited a long time for this moment.

Too long.

Taking my time, I slowly warmed her up. Pushing all the right buttons, her fine motor began purring beneath me. I wrapped my hands around her, slowly stroking her, discovering the feel of her, getting to know her better.

She had unexpected strength and power, but she gave over full control to me, completely trusting me. Not one to hold back, she gave me as much as I wanted, as much as I could take.

I wanted all of her, and I was ready to take her to the next level.

With her sweet motor purring beneath me, I But, wait! There’s more…

The Matches Couldn’t Start A Fire With Gasoline and A Lighter

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Smart Women Prefer Cats

Smart women prefer cats. This is from the Pickles cartoon strip by Brian Crane. He's probably very smart. His work is at http://comics.com/pickles/

Well, it’s been an interesting (read: weird and dull) couple of weeks with my latest Match.com escapades. (This is post number gazillion in my Match.com misadventures.) I’ve noticed a similarity between almost all of the interested men on Match.com: They will make an attempt to schedule a date, including one specific date and time with their request. In the event that ONE date and time don’t work with my schedule I return an alternate date or set of dates.

Then *crickets*

They fall off the face of the Earth and I don’t hear from them again.

???

Here’s the latest update on my Match.com Misadventures…

But, wait! There’s more…

Playing With Matches on Match.com

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Maybe the matches will light a fire and flush out the good ones on Match.com.

Playing with matches

This is totally what it's like.

(If this is your first time here, the Match.com Misadventures starts with this post.)

Since my prospects were dwindling on Match.com, I’ve taken to contacting men first. Some I just send a wink to, and others I email.

I’m only initiating contact because when I polled you all, you said it wasn’t going to negatively impact the potential relationship.

That, and I’m desperate to find good matches.

Here are the matches with whom I’m currently playing…

Zen Biker Guy – (He wrote to me first.) He’s 50, lives in the mountains, loves his dog, and has a dreaded Harley. This Harley is of the “Lone Wolf” variety. This means it’s set up for only one rider – him. He’s divorced, no kids, eats healthy, doesn’t drink, and is hugely into meditation – all pluses. I’ll overlook the Lone Wolf Harley for those pluses.

Our first date was a coffee date. He didn’t look like his pictures (older, heavier, dressed much worse), but close enough that I could still recognize him. He is a big talker; I could hardly get a word in edge-wise. He arrived for the date covered in dirt, after dirt-bike riding right before the date. Apparently he wasn’t concerned with putting on a clean shirt and pants. Or first impressions.

But, wait! There’s more…