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Kernut the Blond

Kernut the Blond
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Category Archives: Humor

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Train and Tumbleweed

Kernut the Blond Posted on February 8, 2012 by KernutFebruary 8, 2012
A Plethora of Tumbleweed.

Train and Tumbleweed An Ode to the Southwest   Never did I think I’d see, Such a plethora of tumbleweed. By north or south or west or east, Far and wide lies the hearty beast. Tumbleweeds cover the desert land, So many so, they’re out of hand.   For hundreds … But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Adventures, Humor | Tagged Life, Travel

Mollie Lost Her Nipple In Purgatory But I Found It

Kernut the Blond Posted on October 3, 2011 by KernutNovember 7, 2012
Mollie's Nipple in Huricane, UT

I found Mollie’s Nipple on the way to Purgatory. I can only assume Mollie is walking around with one nipple. It’s a butte named “Mollie’s Nipple”. Makes you wonder if Mollie was a popular saloon gal back in the day. Or if she lost one in a bar fight. Have … But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Fuckin Hollywood, Humor, Monterey, Travel, WTF? | Tagged Humor, RV Travels

Blond vs. Blonde. Vanna, can I buy an “E”?

Kernut the Blond Posted on September 12, 2011 by KernutSeptember 12, 2011

The “Blond” vs. “Blonde” debate. Or perhaps I should say debacle. Yeah, it’s more like a debacle. *sigh* When I started this blog, I did reference the fact I tend to make a lot of typos. Just remember you were warned. At that time I had no idea I’d misspelled … But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Humor, She's Classy | Tagged Blond Moment, random

The Matches Couldn’t Start A Fire With Gasoline and A Lighter

Kernut the Blond Posted on April 12, 2011 by KernutDecember 6, 2011

Well, it’s been an interesting (read: weird and dull) couple of weeks with my latest Match.com escapades. (This is post number gazillion in my Match.com misadventures.) I’ve noticed a similarity between almost all of the interested men on Match.com: They will make an attempt to schedule a date, including one … But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Dating, Humor, Snarky | Tagged Dating, Single Life

Blond Lemming Becomes Homicidal Without Carbs

Kernut the Blond Posted on March 17, 2011 by KernutMarch 17, 2011

Blond = Me, Kernut the Blond Lemming = A small, hamster-like rodent with suicidal tendencies, known for throwing themselves off cliffs for no apparent reason. I have lemmicidal tendencies. Homicidal = Self explanatory. Does anyone know the statue of limitations for homicide? Why? No reason. First, I apologize to you … But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Humor, She's Classy | Tagged I'm A Lemming, Lemmings Need Carbs Too

Lies My Parents Told Me

Kernut the Blond Posted on February 26, 2011 by KernutFebruary 26, 2011

(This post was inspired by Oh Noa’s on lying to her future children. It reminded me of the many lies my parents told us.) I don’t know about you, but I need some humor while I sort through the Match.com adventures. So today I bring you Lies My Parents Told … But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Humor, My Crazy Childhood | Tagged My Parents Wish I Didn't Blog

I joined Match.com. Again. I blame the cold medicine.

Kernut the Blond Posted on February 9, 2011 by KernutJuly 30, 2012

Yes, I did. I joined Match.com. Again. I’m not well. I blame the cold medicine that got me to join the Booty Camp to which I’m now addicted. Those two things are related. No, I don’t know how. It’s been about seven years and I’d forgotten about this part: I’ve … But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Dating, Humor, Single and Loving It | Tagged Dating Sucks, Gentlemen, Single

How To Survive Giving Your Cat a Subcutaneous Injection

Kernut the Blond Posted on December 31, 2010 by KernutJanuary 2, 2011

Kernut’s Guide to Medicating Your Cat: What the Vet Doesn’t Tell You Remember my cat with stage three kidney disease? There’s no cure, but there are things I can do to slow the progression. Among the lovely solutions: giving her 1/4 of a ten milligram tablet of famotidine (Pepcid) daily, … But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Animals, Humor | Tagged Cats, Trouble

A Pigeon Named Spot

Kernut the Blond Posted on December 26, 2010 by KernutDecember 28, 2010

Once Upon A Time, I Rescued A Pigeon. And I named him Spot. When I first met Spot he was walking across a six-lane street during rush hour, headed towards the median. Cars were whizzing by him, but he seemed not to notice the imminent danger. Or maybe he just … But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Animals, Dating, Humor | Tagged Animals, Dating, Humor

Ten Things: Crazy Street Names

Kernut the Blond Posted on November 30, 2010 by KernutNovember 30, 2010

I was doing research for my day job when I came across Crazy Street names. Honestly, folks. It’s moments like this that make made coming to work kinda fun. (I wrote that yesterday. Today I was let go! OMG. It’s kind of a shock since in my review two weeks … But, wait! There’s more…

Posted in Humor, Ten Things | Tagged Ten Things

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