Zombies, RV Life, and Random Craziness
- Willcox, Arizona, resting place of Warren Earp, Rex Allen and Koko the Horse.
- Happy Birthday! Checkers, the RV copilot, turned 18 today.
- Ten Things: Random Observations From the Road
- Put the hooker in the box, and the bird in the closet.
- “The Thing” in Dragoon, Arizona? It’s a dead thing.
- Bugzilla, my new roommate.
- Tombstones in Tombstone, Arizona
- Holy Flying Vampires, Y’all! The bugs are big in Texas.
- From the Ocean-to-Ocean Bridge to the Bridge to Nowhere, and shaking your dates in between.
- Severe Weather Alert: Like a cow pissin on a flat rock.
- The Center of the World, and two blondes in Mexico.
- Don’t make me get my gun out. Again.
- I got down, way down, in Calipatria.
- I was eaten by a giant dinosaur, and then I found millions of Zombie Fish.
- Cement boats, giant artichokes, old jails, and two-story outhouses.
- Ten Things You Must Know Before Buying a Used RV
- Train and Tumbleweed
- Giant Bunnies, Giant Monopoly Boards, and World’s Longest Garlic Braid. Welcome to Northern California.
- 28 Days Later
- Border Patrol = Reno 911
Pimpin my affiliates… Seriously, this blog can not survive on my writing alone.
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By Kernut, on December 5th, 2011%
 Everyone told me “There’s a naked man in Quartzsite, Arizona. You’ve got to go there.”
Well, duh! Of course I do.
My friends, and folks I meet on my travels, give me some of the best tips. I love you people!
They were right, as usual; he was naked except for a hat, a necklace, and a small crocheted “sock” over his privates. (‘small’ is not a comment on the size of anything other than the sock)
I think there is a little satin bow on it, but I couldn’t look that closely without being accused of staring.
No, NO. On the sock.
Sheesh, I really have conditioned you all to go to the dark side first, haven’t I?
You’re welcome.
He shaves.
No, not his beard. (TMI? Sorry.)
The “sock” was held up by fishing line.
Nothing covered his back side. Don’t stop now! Continue reading I met a naked man in Quartzsite, Arizona.
By Kernut, on July 18th, 2010%
 Cadillac Graveyard. Yup. Ass-end up. In the dirt. Today, for your traveling pleasure I present you all with The 8 Weirdest Places In America that I plan to visit.
There’s 9 if you count this blog. Bonus for you!
As you know, I like touring brothels. I love seeing the weirdest of the weird, the strangest of the strange. No really, I’m freaky like that.
Particularly fond of these American Absurdities, I affectionately call this collection of bizarre sights and wacky places I’d like to visit ‘Cheezy Americana’. Vegas is a city based on Cheezy Americana. I love it in all it’s glittery and wacky tackiness.
Since you seem like my cheezy blog, I thought you all might like other things “Cheezy Americana”.
I made a list for you. You’re welcome. Don’t stop now! Continue reading UPDATED: 8 Weirdest Places In America – Cheezy Americana
By Kernut, on May 20th, 2010%
 Mirroring: one of the methods practiced in Tantra. Do sexually confident women scare men or is this an attractive quality?
Really, I want to know. My sexual confidence and security has intimidated more than a few boyfriends. It’s a running theme. And, sadly, the older and more confident I get, the more I seem to intimidate them. So it’s not like it’s going away and I have no intention of squashing it.
But I’m about ready to give up all efforts at finding a match.
Before you let your kinky imaginations run wild… I don’t even get a chance to bring out the whips and chains before they get scared (read: ‘sudden loss of interest below the waist’).
I’m kidding about the whips and chains. Kind of.
Seriously, I’m not even a screamer, much. I just enjoy sex and am not shy about it, or talking about it.
Is that intimidating to men? Don’t stop now! Continue reading Sexual Confidence: Can You Handle It?
By Kernut, on May 7th, 2010%
My friend: “Who do you think buys more sex toys, men or women?” . . . → Read More: Who Bought Your Sex Toys?
By Kernut, on April 28th, 2010%
I learned to mix drinks, quite well actually, and we all had a grand time drinking up the liquor cabinet after school. When the booze would run low, Dad would just replace it. Awesome. *hiccup* . . . → Read More: Drinking and Smoking: My Childhood Memories
By Kernut, on April 22nd, 2010%
  ... In honor of Wicked Girls Think It’s “NPD” on Saturday, April 24th this post is about underwear. (If you don’t know what ‘NPD’ is yet, check out Wicked Shawn’s post Wicked Wednesday Q&A from 4/14. Scroll to Question #1, by yours truly. Note that the date IS Saturday, April 24th, not the 23rd as in my comment.)
I’ll wait, but come back after you’ve read about NPD. (I’d say what it is here, but you know, my parents still read my blog. Although, they’ll probably stop after reading this post.)
As I was saying, in honor of NPD, I’ve decided to share a few embarrassing underwear moments, not all of them mine. Heh heh.
I’ll show you mine, you can show me yours later. In the comments, or by email: swtrpnzl (at) aim (dot) com. Pictures are accepted.
I reserve the right to repost your pictures and blog about them. So if you send ‘em, you’d better be proud of ‘em.
For your pleasure, three embarrassing underwear moments… Don’t stop now! Continue reading Embarrassing Moments in Underwear – I’ll show you mine…
By Kernut, on April 14th, 2010%
 Checkers, The Kibble Wrangler I am owned by a cat. Those of you who know me well know Checkers, The Kibble Wrangler, is my world.
MY. WORLD.
Yes, I am a crazy cat lady.
Love me, love the cat. It’s a package deal.
Now that we’ve established that, realize that she can do little wrong. This will become evident as this story progresses.
My sister, Chickenbone, used to always ask, “How can you have a cat? There’s that whole stinky litter box that needs to be scooped all the time, there’s the barfing on the carpet. All that’s just gross.” (I retorted with some quip about children and diapers. I do not have kids. She now has a cat/litter box and a kid/diapers. I win.)
Yes, kitty poop is gross, as is the occasional cling-on (poo stuck to butt fur), but it’s so inconsequential when compared to the unconditional love she gives.
MY. WORLD., People.
This post is in honor of her approaching 16th birthday. Happy Birthday Checkers, from the interwebs! (Yup, she gets gifts and special treats on her birthday just like I do. Mine is coming before hers. Feel free to send gifts to both of us. My email address in on my About page. She wants a big cat tree. I want a tropical vacation.)
On with the cat-ass-trophe… Don’t stop now! Continue reading Cat-ass-trophe
By Kernut, on April 8th, 2010%
Have you ever been to a brothel? Of course you have! Well I have, too. Three, actually. All on the same day. I’m a studdette like that. . . . → Read More: Sex in Carson City: My Trip to The Brothels – UPDATE
By Kernut, on March 25th, 2010%
It was a match made in heaven: Three gals, three guys, a wee party, and an illegal bonfire. . . . → Read More: My First Brush With The Law
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