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Greeting Cards for The Zombie Apocalypse

zombie cat sympathy card - front

Their tag line? “Close Combat Techniques… because you WILL run out of ammo.” Seriously, they’re right. You will. They ask us ‘When the dead rise, will you be able to dispatch them with a simple smile on your face and a witty comeback on your lips?’ I think not. These guys are really smart – they’re thinking ahead. They’re thinking OUTSIDE of the Zombie box, people. We need to do the same or we’re going to be left behind. That’s when I came up with the idea for Zombie Apocalypse Greeting Cards . . . → Read More: Greeting Cards for The Zombie Apocalypse

Cuff Em Danno

The cop goes to uncuff him, but he can’t find his handcuff key. It’s gone. Totally lost. He asks if I have mine. Nope. Didn’t expect to be doing the handcuffing on this one. Plus my key was taken away from me. But that’s another story. So the cop leaves me alone in the apartment with the handcuffed BIG dude. Who could head-butt me to death with one blow. Who is innocent of skipping bail. But not cop-killing. . . . → Read More: Cuff Em Danno

If Facebook Existed Through History

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(Disclaimer – I didn’t write this. It’s too funny and creative, so obviously. I got it in an email from one of my awesome friends. I have no idea whom to credit for the following hilarious post.)

If Facebook Existed Through History:

My favorite are the last two status posts, God and Ancient Asteroid. I especially love the last two comments.

A Big Lump On My Butt Cheek

Butt map

A pain in the ass. P.I.T.A. for short. You might be thinking: ‘Is she having kinky sex again? Did things get a bit wild?’ Sadly, no. And it’s not painful, anymore. . . . → Read More: A Big Lump On My Butt Cheek

I Brought Sand To The Beach

Head in the sand.

My sister, Chickenbone, once told me ‘Don’t bring sand to the beach.’ Me: ??? Chickenbone: If you’re single, don’t bring a date to a party. Me: (still) ??? Chickebone: …where there are single men. Me (a minute later): Ohhhh. (the light bulb isn’t always super bright, folks) . . . → Read More: I Brought Sand To The Beach

Life Before The Computer

Casual Friday for the telecommuter.

Just a short post (that I totally copied from a funny email). (Just so you know, this isn’t plagiarism like what happened to Aunt Becky at Mommy Wants Vodka. No, seriously. It is not! This came from one of those e-jokes, and had no author listed. It’s totally different. Mostly because I’m just to lazy to write a real post today and this was funny. They typos, however, are totally mine since I retyped this from scratch.)

Life Before The Computer: Don’t stop now! Continue reading Life Before The Computer

Capitola Begonia Festival is Live Blogging FAIL #2

Capitola Begonia Festival 2010. Outlaw 36 Gang's Octopus's Garden.
Capitola Begonia Festival 2010. Outlaw 36 Gang's Octopus's Garden.

Capitola Begonia Festival 2010. Outlaw 36 Gang's Octopus's Garden took third place. (photo courtesy of/borrowed from The Santa Cruz Sentinel.)

What is it with me and these Live Blogging fails?? Seriously.

I don’t claim to be a techno genius, but it shouldn’t be this hard. Twitter hates me. That’s all I can think of.

Or, my unicorn force field has disturbed the ability of my technology to function correctly.

Crap.

Well, on with the AWESOMENESS that was to be my live blog from the Capitola Begonia Festival. Don’t stop now! Continue reading Capitola Begonia Festival is Live Blogging FAIL #2